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As part of her apprenticeship at the village pub, Miss Pink has been nominated to be the hostess at the Beltaine festivities in the village hall in May, and provided with a suitable dress for the occasion, with instructions to see that she properly prepares for the night. Having attended a fair few of these events in previous years, she knows full well that the hostess usually ends the night sitting chest-deep in an open barrel of Lady's Brew while the revellers dip their tankards all round her, so she wants to be sure the dress is up to the job. So she decides to test it, with lashings and lashings of custard.
First, she pours four litres of custard onto the floor, making a nice gooey pool, she then slide-steps into the pool, coating the lower hem, and then bends down and ensures the lower few inches of the skirt are thoroughly coated inside and out.
Next she makes custard hand-prints all up the front of the dress, before placing a pair of prints on her silk-clad bottom.
The hand-prints are followed by several litres of custard down the front, then she sits in the floor pool and plays with the custard and her dress, also taking time to carefully fill each wellie with yellow goo.
Finally, she covers her hair, shoulders, and still-clean back in yellow mess. Satisfied that the dress is indeed suitable for wearing in a barrel of beer, she sits back and relaxes in the custard.